13 Bon-bon mots

I know, it's supposed to be 13 THURSDAY, but hey, life got in the way. Anyhow, for your homemade christmas cracker entertainment, here are 13 riddles ready for including in even the corniest of bon-bons.

1. Why do elves go to school?
A: to learn their elf-abet

2.What does Santa do in his off time?
A: he gardens. What did you think all the ho ho hoing was about?

3.Who writes all Santa's lists?
A:The pen-guins

4.What do you get when Santa slides down a chimney where the fire is on?
A: A Crisp Cringle

5. What kind of candle burns longer - a red one or a greeen one?
A: Neither. All candles burn shorter, not longer.

6. What do the elves sing as Santa takes off from the North Pole each year?
A: Freeze a jolly good fellow.

7. Sportsmen get athlete's foot. What do astronauts get?
A: Missile-toe

8.What does Rudolf do in the off season?
A: He works in the red light district

9. Where do Santa's helpers find their job description?
A: In the elf-help section of the library

10. How do we know Microsoft now has a complete monopoly?
A: Even Santa has changed from chimneys to Windows

11. Which is the worst mannered reindeer?
A: Rude-olp

12. How many Surrealists does it take to decorate a Christmas tree?
A: the fish

13. What is the new name for Santa's little helpers?
A: Subordinate clauses

Yibbida, yibbida, yibbida -- that's all folks. :-)