Wednesday, September 12, 2007

I'm moving!!!

Yes, I do mean more than breathing and occasionally getting off the couch to go pee. My blog is upping stakes and moving to Word Press at

Yay!!!! I've heard so many good things about Word Press. I hope they're all true.

Thanks to Jodici designs. :-)

Please follow the breadcrumbs and meet me over there.

Luv ya,


Old, but good

Someone sent me these in an email, and since I don't want to bore you about my edits on Between the Gutter and the Sky, I thought I'd share the following giggles.

"OLD" IS WHEN Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer, "Pick one; I can't do both!"

"OLD " IS WHEN ... Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

"OLD " IS WHEN . A sexy babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door..

"OLD" IS WHEN .... Going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

"OLD " IS WHEN .. You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

"OLD" IS WHEN .... You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.

"OLD" IS WHEN "Getting a little action" means you don't need to take any fiber today

"OLD " IS WHEN .... "Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.

"OLD" IS WHEN . An "all nighter" means not getting up to use the bathroom. AND

"OLD" IS WHEN .... You are not sure these are jokes

"OLD" IS WHEN ..... it takes longer to rest than it did to get tired in the first place...

Sunday, September 09, 2007

The Gospel According to St Brat

I've been busy lately and not baking as much as I normally do, so it was no surprise when the boys descended on today's efforts like a flock of ganets. But after 2 egg pies and 2 apple turnovers each, I told them they'd had enough.

"Puh-lease, can I have another one?" they begged.

But I stood firm, until the oldest told me I was breaking biblical principles.

"How do you figure that?" I asked him.

"It clearly says,'Ask and you SHALL recieve."

What to say?????

Friday, September 07, 2007

Americans, be afraid!!!!!!!!

Be very afraid. Australia is holding your president hostage in an undisclosed Australian jail where he is being tortured daily (by having to listen to our Prime Minister. It's rumored that Osama Bin Ladan visited to get his autograph, but nearly had snipers turn him into a colander.

Never fear, I have decided to release your president unharmed providing all Americans purchase at least one copy of all my books. Otherwise, I'm afraid I'll have to let the killer koalas eat him with their gum leaves.

Thursday, September 06, 2007

This 'n That

So much to do I'm trying not to spin in circles. So far today--

- cleaned up after the milk fight the boys had at breakfast. We're talking cubboards, counters, floor - ugh! Did I mention I love my new steam mop. Good side of this is I now have a clean kitchen. :-)

- fertilized lettuce. Grow you little suckers. It's spring don't you know!

- checked email. Found out my ed is up to p131 of Between the Gutter and the Sky and loving it. She said she'd been laughing so loud that her husband asked her what was up. :-) ANd this one isn't even a comedy, so that's good to know. I also found her blog when I googled The Marian Kind to see if any new reviews were up. She said some nice stuff.

A second manuscript came my way this week. Babe King's Between the Gutter and the Sky. I'm looking forward to working with Babe. Having proofed her The Marian Kind, I know I love her style. The premise sounds very cool, so from the week after next, I'll be working on that too.

Then trying to find out how to nominate my CP Gemma for the Avon Red awards- can I say I'm clueless? But she really deserves this.

Got a load of washing on. WHy do little boys put such disgusting things in their pockets? Now I have 2 baskets of ironing to catch up on. I let them grow while I was running the boys back and forth for their circus performances every day last week. ANd then of course I'll have to dust and mop the laundry since ironing always upsets my sinuses.

THEN, hopefully, as long as the sky doesn't fall, I'll get back to writing Theft of the Golden Hooha. Yesterday I took out the third fight scene. I hated doing it. Loved the scene, but frankly it was baggage that killed pace. WHaaaaaaaaaaaa. Killing my darlings. Moving on. This afternoon I hope to work out what Grant learns in the bar, and how I can patch the hole I made by taking out the third fight scene. Gives me something to think about while I'm ironing anyway.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

I return you to the wisdom of the ages...

...lest I get too philosophical. Yup. This entry is deep as a carpark puddle and snatched from the jaws of ...well, laughter, over at SRN.

Wisdom of the Young

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptise cats.
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the
second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.

Wisdom of the Old

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts..
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy.
6) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
7) Forget the health food. Elderly need all the preservatives they can get.
8) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down
9) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking
chair that you
once got from a roller coaster.
10) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to
ask you the questions.

Saturday, September 01, 2007

Gender Benders

I'm sitting here watching k.d.lang (a woman who dresses as a man) being interviewed by Dame Edna Everage (a man who dresses up as an over-the-top woman) and I'm splitting my sides laughing. Oh my! It's offensive, in your face and totally brilliant!

How is this relevant? Recently I recieved a few contest crits back about my WIP and they mentioned that my characters can be irreverent, even a bit offensive, and that squeemish readers may be put off by some of their lines and thoughts. Yah! The accusation came as a shock, and yet not. I mean, basically I'll mock anything that holds still long enough for me to sling at. Guess I'm genetically rude, or maybe I figure if you can't laugh at yourself, you're taking life too seriously. Anyway, one said my heroine is a homophobe because of the OTT way she reacts to a couple of lesbians she's dealing with. I figured my heroine's shock was cute/funny, and played off her conservative Vermont upbringing, especially when they pass her coffee in a boob cup and she has to sip it while trying to ignore the bright pink nipple near the handle. Well, I thought it was funny. Guess I'm just a sick person. The whole reason I use gender benders in my work is to stir up the reactions of my main characters.

Anyway, my question is, where is the line where the shock of irreverence stops being funny and becomes offensive? I'd love to hear some different points of view. Let it rip, girls. :-)

Thursday, August 30, 2007

Having trouble with your synopsis?

Let Bunny theater help. If they can shrink a 3hr movie to thirty seconds, you can shrink 400p to 2. Sit back, grab a piece of popcorn (you won't have time for more than one) and watch Titanic like you've never seen it before.