All Kids Should Hear This

As the new year fast approaches I am going all philosphical on you. Blame the fact I have 2 bratz underfoot for the school hols, or the fact I got testicles for Christmas (nope, still not over it!), but there are some truths which society today needs to hear in my opinion. So look out! Babe is on the soapbox and not blowing bubbles.

Today's tell-it-like-it-is comes from Bill Gates. Love him or hate him, he sure hits the nail on the head with this!

Bill Gates recently gave a speech at a High School about 11 things they did not and will not learn in school. He talked about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.

Rule 1: Life is not fair - get used to it!

Rule 2: The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3: You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.

Rule 6: If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing (getting rid of lice) the closet in your own room.

Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

If you agree, pass it on.
If you can read this - Thank a teacher!
If you are reading it in English -Thank a soldier!!

Have A Good One!

What Did You Get For Christmas?

Crikey, talk about bring out the Christmas nuts! Out of all the wonderful things out there, this is what my boys got me! They reckon I get stressed because I'm the only one in the house who doesn't have a set. Hmmm... Could be some truth in that. I think maybe I should start a whole collection then. Wadda ya reckon? I'll ask the Easter bunny for a carving knife.

I may be talking to the boys again by February. Maybe.

What did you get for Christmas? Maybe we can swap. :-)
Hope you had a real ball, er... good time.

God Bless You All

Wishing all my friends and readers a blessed and merry Christmas. May all your secret wishes come true,

Much love,

Babe

Tell Me the Truth-- Is This Too Much?

He, He, He. You have to love a time of year when you can be over-the-top gaudy and no one thinks anything about it. :-)

And if, like me, you're looking for something yummy to nibble while you're wrapping a mountain of presents, try this.


3 cups popped popcorn
3 cups nacho cheese flavored snacks
2 cups pretzel sticks
1 cup Cheerios® or Nutragrain cereal
1/3 cup butter or margarine, melted
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1 garlic clove, very finely chopped, or 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
1. Heat oven to 300ºF.
2. Mix popcorn, snacks, pretzels and cereal in large bowl. Mix remaining ingredients. Drizzle over popcorn mixture, tossing until evenly coated. Spread in ungreased jelly roll pan, 15 1/2x10 1/2X1 inch.
3. Bake uncovered 15 minutes, stirring twice. Cool. Store loosely covered at room temperature up to 2 weeks.

Microwave Directions: Place butter, chili powder and garlic in 3-quart microwavable casserole or bowl. Microwave uncovered on High about 1 minute or until butter is melted. Stir. Stir in popcorn, snacks, pretzels and cereal. Toss until well coated. Microwave uncovered 6 to 8 minutes, stirring every 2 minutes, until toasted. Cool and consume in huge quanitities.

Yummy!

Yummy!

My kitchen didn't smell right, but now it does, thanks to these delicious Greek biscuits.


Ingredients:
1/2 Teaspoon Baking Soda
4 Tablespoon Brandy
2 1/2 Teaspoon Cinnamon
1 2/3 Cup Flour Self-rising
5 Oz Olive Oil
1 Whole Oranges Squeezed
1 Pinch Salt To taste
4/5 Cup Sugar
3/4 Cup Walnuts
2/3 Cup Water
Directions:
* Beat the oil and 1/3 c sugar well, add the brandy, orange juice and 1/2 tsp cinnamon and blend.
* Sift the flour with a pinch of salt and the soda and add it gradually into the oil and sugar mixture, mixing it with a spoon.
* Knead the dough well for about 10 minutes.
* If too sticky, add 1-2 tablespoons more flour and mix it well.
* Knead until it feels soft and pliable.
* Flour your hands and take egg-sized portions of dough.
* Roll and shape them into small oval shapes.
* Place on an unbuttered baking sheet, and flatten them with the palm of your hand.
* Bake in a pre-heated oven, gas no. 4/ 350 grades F/ 180 grades C), for 25 minutes.
* Let them cool and harden for 24 hours before dipping them in the honey syrup.
* Prepare the syrup by mixing in a saucepan the honey,1/2 c sugar and water.
* Bring slowly to the boil, skim with a spoon, then simmer for 4-5 minutes.
* Dip the cold melomakarona in the hot syrup, three or four at a time only.
* Let them stand for 1 minute and take them out with a slotted spoon.
* Place on a decorative platter and immediately sprinkle with a little cinnamon and chopped walnuts.
* If they are not consumed during the next 3-4 days they should be kept in airtight tins, like biscuits.
* Allow two melomakarona per person!

Free Stuff

Maybe this will help your Christmas cheer, esp if you live in the USA and can get all the things banned to us in Oz. Wow! But even if you don't, there's free tags to finish off your pressie wrapping and desk top decorations and stuff. Make sure you play "Clause! The Other Side"- my kids had a ball and didn't drive me nuts for almost an hour!
http://www.christmasfreebies.com/

Ho ho hum

I think my holiday spirit evaporated in the recent bushfires. Got my tree up, menu planned, next ironing. Ugh, what a life. How are your holidays going?

Big GOOD Wolf

Wed and widowed in one day, stunning socialite Amelia Sinclair's honeymoon is anything but typical. Then again, neither is Amelia--rebellious and impulsive, marrying Robert Collingsworth was the one sensible thing she ever did. Now he's dead and she must escape the vicious creatures stalking her--even if it means relying on a stranger. Well, maybe not a complete stranger. Amelia first glimpsed Gabriel Wulf years ago on the busy streets of London; since then he has haunted her dreams. But in the flesh, Gabriel is much more tantalizing than she ever dreamt, and much more complicated…

Gabriel Wulf, the strong one, the sensible one--the, and the curse that plagued them, were his only priorities; there was little time for women and none for love. Now, he must protect an enticing beauty--and not just from the dangers that prowl the woods around them. Gabriel has secrets, dark ones he's sure Amelia must never know and could never understand. But she has already awakened his heart...and the beast within. Will Amelia be the key to his salvation, or the architect of her own demise?

What reviewers are saying...

"Newest Wild Wulf of London book is intense, sexy and poignant."
Lory Martin, Fresh Fiction on The Cursed One

“Vivid description, wonderful characters, and a story line that holds you tight destine The Cursed One for the keeper shelf. Bravo, Ms. Thompson, bravo.”
5 Kisses, Romance Divas, Kristen Painter

“Though I know I sound like a broken record, I make no excuse for it because the Wild Wulfs Of London are Hot! Hot! Hot!”
Shannon Johnson, Romance Reader At Heart on The Cursed One


“Chills will run up your spine as danger and passion rise, and Thompson works her magic. Succumb to the lure of the Wulf.”
Kathe Robin, Romantic Times Book Reviews
4 ½ stars Top Pick and K.I.S.S. award recipient from Romantic Times

“Ronda Thompson has written a story that will stay with me for a long time. She has put feelings and love into it and came out with a winner.”
Fallen Angels Reviews, Recommended Read

“The latest Wild Wulfs of London (see THE UNTAMED ONE and THE DARK ONE) is a superb werewolf Regency romantic suspense thriller that starts off as a five star howl and never slows down until the final confrontation between beauty and the beast.”
Five stars from Harriet Klausner on The Cursed One

"Author Ronda Thompson has given us a fantastic series about The Wild Wulfs of London and their legendary curse."
A Romance Review (The Cursed One)

13 Bon-bon mots

I know, it's supposed to be 13 THURSDAY, but hey, life got in the way. Anyhow, for your homemade christmas cracker entertainment, here are 13 riddles ready for including in even the corniest of bon-bons.

1. Why do elves go to school?
A: to learn their elf-abet

2.What does Santa do in his off time?
A: he gardens. What did you think all the ho ho hoing was about?

3.Who writes all Santa's lists?
A:The pen-guins

4.What do you get when Santa slides down a chimney where the fire is on?
A: A Crisp Cringle

5. What kind of candle burns longer - a red one or a greeen one?
A: Neither. All candles burn shorter, not longer.

6. What do the elves sing as Santa takes off from the North Pole each year?
A: Freeze a jolly good fellow.

7. Sportsmen get athlete's foot. What do astronauts get?
A: Missile-toe

8.What does Rudolf do in the off season?
A: He works in the red light district

9. Where do Santa's helpers find their job description?
A: In the elf-help section of the library

10. How do we know Microsoft now has a complete monopoly?
A: Even Santa has changed from chimneys to Windows

11. Which is the worst mannered reindeer?
A: Rude-olp

12. How many Surrealists does it take to decorate a Christmas tree?
A: the fish

13. What is the new name for Santa's little helpers?
A: Subordinate clauses

Yibbida, yibbida, yibbida -- that's all folks. :-)

Yes!

Woo diddly hoo! November- December have been good for me. First By Grace Publishing bought "Something Blue" for their bridal anthology next year, then the whole final in Romancing the Tome thing which goes off to an agent in January for final judging, then Medallion asked for a full of "Come to Heal", now Cup of Comfort has bought the short I sent them, "Bloodlines and Heart Strings." Yep, nothing quite like ending the year with a bang. I think 2007 is going to be my year. :-)

E or Print?

Tell the truth -- are you sending e-cards or printed ones this year, or a mixture of both? I have to tell you, e-cards look good. Cute, animated, quick, basically free. I realize you can't hang them on the wall, but when you consider the message still gets there, minus the environmental cost and personal stationary/stamps cost, well, the concept sounds appealing, no? Maybe I'm finally being dragged kicking and screaming into the 21st century?

Naturally there will be those who you can't send e-cards. Some of the sweet older folk I know still don't have a computer, much less net access. For them it will always be the postman who labors hard to bring their news, usually with a shopping voucher or hankerchief or something tucked in for good measure.

But think about the poor postie. Few outside of Santa's elves work as hard as postmen at Christmas. No knocking twice in December. No, sorry love, no time!

Anyway, for those of you who WILL be sending e-cards, I found this cute, free site.
http://www.fromtheheartpostcards.com/ChristmasLinksPage.html

Happy writing, y'all.

Kristen Tagged Me!

I've just been tagged like a new puppy, so here for your reading pleasure are my history, habits and hopes. :-)

Four jobs I've had:
(Most of you know about the medical stuff, singing career, etc, so I thought I'd put up some of the smaller jobs you may not know I've done.

1. Dental Assistant (not qualified for this but I did it for 3 weeks to help the dentist out until he got a proper dental nurse)
2. Sheet metal worker- during school holidays in my teens (amazingly I still have all my fingers! Hard, dirty work and def. not recommended, though they did try to teach me how to weld which was cool.)
3. At age 15 I ran the Myer's Handcraft section and was best shop girl in the whole haberdashery/wools/laces and handcraft section {did this for 6 months full time when I got thrown out of home before I took myself back to school. I was very proud of the fact people would ask for me. The reason was I always told them straight what worked and was worth the money and what didn't, and you know, that translated into more sales, so everybody won. Plus I'd done most of the crafts and often helped if customers got stuck halfway through their project. You can't beat helpful service, even if your shop girl IS not long out of nappies. :-)
4. Face Painter for carnivals (I did the Christmas carnivals year after year and even got regulars. It was lovely to see the kids growing from one visit to the next)
5. Art Dealer's assistant (at Warana)
I could go on, but maybe next time. :-)

Four places I've lived:
1. Brisbane, Queensland
2. Toowoomba, Queensland
3. Sydney, New South Wales
4. Tasmania

Four favorite foods:
1. watermelon
2. seafood- any sort
3. baked pumpkin
4. pavlova

Four movies I could watch over and over:
1. 10 Things I Hate About You
2. Mulan
3. Lord of the Rings
4. Benny & June

Four TV shows I enjoy:
1. Better Homes and Gardens
2. Gilmore Girls (though it hasn't been on in a while)
3. Funniest Home Video Show
4. ack, couldn't think of a fourth. I don't watch much TV.

Four places I've traveled:
1. Nepal
2. Thailand
3. Vanuatu
4. New Zealand

Four places I'd like to visit:
1. Paris
2. Antarctica
3. Patagonia
4. Disneyland

Four websites I go to daily:
1. Yahoo
2. Google
3. Romance Divas
4. Monsters

Four people I'm tagging to do this too:
Heather
Amanda
MG Braden
Eva

Halo, Halo, Halo

'Tis the season for cooking and handcrafts, plus I'd like to give you something for Christmas, so I've been searching and come up with this great free cross stitch pattern. Want to sew this darling angel for someone special? Go to:

http://crossstitch.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?zi=1/XJ/Ya&sdn=crossstitch&cdn=hobbies&tm=26&gps=134_7_1072_545&f=10&su=p662.5.140.ip_p445.92.150.ip_&tt=14&bt=1&bts=1&zu=http%3A//www.dawnsxstitch.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/freeangel.htm

Little Angels?

I think not!

I was ranting about my thirteen year old son's great attitude to work, namely, "21st century kids shouldn't have to do any, Mum!", when a friend sent me these stories about other parents and their darlings. I feel better about my own after reading these.

FIRST TESTIMONY:
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release
some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of
her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons.
I told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished.
To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening,
"If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you
kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"

The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and
walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.


SECOND TESTIMONY:
Have you ever ! asked your child a question too many times?
My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly.
One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch, in between errands
It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco,
I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, she was clean. The realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while. I asked him if he needed to go,and he said "No." I kept thinking, "Oh boy, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me."
Then I said, Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?"
"No," he replied.
I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse.
Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over, spread his cheeks and yelled
"SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"
While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better, thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

Oh brother, WHY do we have kids?

Calling All Elves

Nevermind action at the shoe maker's joint, well, unless you're one of my foot-fetish CPs. (hey, you know I love ya!) This time of year elves are busy finishing off gifts for all the good girls and boys. And gathering coal for the rest of us. :-)

So, if like me you're busy putting glitz into Christmas preparations, maybe you'd like to consider yourself an honorary elf for the season. What's your secret elf name? Shh, don't tell, well, except here, of course. :-)

Mine?

Your Elf Name Is...

Giggles Snaggle Tooth

What's Your Elf Name?

Everything Has a Value

I just wanted to share a little poem found in our Women's Ministries newsletter. Author unknown.

Happiness keeps you sweet,
Trials keep you strong,
Sorrows keep you human,
Failures keep you humble,
Success keeps you glowing,
But only God keeps you going.

May you all glow this festive season. :-)

Keep Your Promises

Maybe I'm titchy because I just spent every living moment this last fortnight getting Come To Heal edited so I could send the full off to Medallion. (Yay!) I need sleep and that always makes me picky -- all right, cranky, nasty, the total bitch on wheels.

BUT I just watched "Collateral", and I'm really annoyed. I hated the ending. The rest of the movie wasn't bad if you can get past Tom Cruise playing the bad guy- sheesh, he reminds me of a boy scout. I want to shake my finger and send him to the corner (especially after what he did to Nicole.)

HOWEVER I feel really let down by the way the film writers wrote the ending. I felt like they'd written themselves into this great hole and saw the word limit fast approaching and just went, what the heck. Have the professional assassin shot by an amateur. Hey,it could happen. Yeah, right!

It's a good reminder to all of us - don't slack off just because you're near the end. Finish with as big a bang as you started with!

Sadie was a Saddist

I'm sure I'm not alone when I admit that I hate housework. I'd definitely prefer to sweep the room with a glance and dust my taste buds with icing sugar, than take on the dust bunnies under the bed each week. (What if they're related to the Easter Bunny? My labours could have serious, chocolate-depriving consequences!) Alas, there are some drudergies involved in being a mum that are inescapable.

Or are they?

I found some wonderful advice on the net about how to eliminate cleaning forever! Yes, ladies and gentlemen (what? some men DO do the cleaning) it CAN be done!!!!! Such pearls of wisdom are far too good to leave in their oyster, so here for your pleasure is how to be done with drudgery for good. Enjoy!

HOW TO CLEAN THE HOUSE
1. Open a new file in your pc.
2. Name it "Housework."
3. Send it to the recycle bin.
4. Empty the recycle bin.
5. Your pc will ask you, "Are you sure you want To delete Housework permanently?"
6. Calmly answer, "Yes," and press mouse button firmly......
7. Feel better?

Strictly for the Birds

I have a secret new pleasure no one knows about, not even my kids. (Well, no one until now.) Usually by the time evening comes around I am too tired to be bothered with dishes. It just seems one more hurdle I can't face. So every morning when I'm gathering the mountains of dishes and scraping them off ready for the dishwasher, I gather the leftover bits from the plates and toast crumbs off the kitchen counter and throw them out the door onto my lawn. Yeah, it looks messy, for about 20 minutes. Then my army of WWFF (will work for food) descend.

I back this ploy up, of course, by putting in water features and native food plants for my workers (they didn't even need unions to negotiate these excellent work conditions), but everyone who visits here is amazed how many wrens, sparrows, parrots, honey eaters and pidgeons stay at my place whittling down the undesirable insects in my garden.

Sure, they are a bother with seedlings, but nothing some netting won't fix. Plus they bring me joy. I feel like I am playing some small part in helping care for God's smallest creatures, and their color and antics bring many a happy, procrastinating moment throughout the busy day as I "consider the birds of the field who neither sow nor reap." :-)

Come to Peel

me off the ceiling please. :-)

You know, sometimes life just goes right and it always comes as a shock! I heard yesterday that "Come to Heal" finalled in the ROmancing the Tome competition. Yep, color me happy. Today I got my judges sheets. Here's one:

"Fabulous entry. You earned my highest score. :) It was exciting. Well written. Excellent detail. Wonderful dialogue. My only regret is not getting the whole manuscript to read. :)"

and another

"I like your writing style. You have great description and the action of the story started off great."

and this one:

"Great! Loved it! Want to read more!"

But then, the cruncher, my very next email was Medallion press requesting a full!!!! So, um, that blimp floating over the horizon isn't a weather balloon, it's Babe's big head. Just nobody dart me, okay, 'cause I'm so puffed up at the mo I might end up in Antartica somewhere. :-)

Eeek, I'm Dying

Tie-dyeing that is. Heeeeeeeello 1960's. Not that I remember them of course, but then they say anyone who does wasn't really there. Besides, I'm more of a caffeine powered than flower power kind of person.

Anyway, since I had to mix up a vat of dye to finish off the 13 year old's batik, I figured I'd do tie-dyeing with the 7 yr old. Tie-dyeing is such a hippie/free love/save the world kind of craft that I like my kids to try it at least once, plus I try to do something crafty with them at least once a month to let them know Mummy does factor them into her time usage. That way I can justify the disgusting number of hours I spend romancing my keyboard.

So now I have a whole line of deep purple things flapping in the breeze. (Wonder what the neighbors think of that!)And I must tell you, that suggestion you wear rubber gloves for this craft is a good one. Pity I didn't give it a thought or read the dye packet BEFORE I turned my cuticles purple. Oh well, guess I'm more of a writer than an instruction reader. :-)

The Cat's Outta The Bag

I think I am sometimes a literary snob. Y'know, I don't try to be, but often when I'm reading I feel sick to my stomach at what makes it into print.

One of my bug-boos is category fiction. Like so many novices before me, I used to think cats were just a shorter length, simpler characters and plot version of ST. I wrote 2 medical cats and, not surprisingly, they were rejected as inappropriate voice, characters and plot for cat. Well der...... All those things I thought I'd improved on the medicals I'd read were the very things that made mine inappropriate. I just didn't get it at the time.

Recently one of my CPs started writing a cat for Nocturn. This is a girl whose ST work I love, whose voice I know well, and yeah, my stomach did the whole quigley thing just thinking about it. I wanted to be a good CP and be honest, but I was scared I would hate it. WELL, I did the crit anyway. It wasn't what I was used to, but you know, I didn't hate it either. I started to notice the differences between cat and ST. There's a whole lot more between them than length. Everything from heavy backstory in the beginning ( a no-no for ST), to simpler sentence construction and humor, less description/character dev/plot complexity, basically, lots of things that damage a good story.

I thought.

Then, I picked up and read one of Hartlequin's new line, Next. It was serendipity, because likely I would never have bought this book for myself, but wow! It threw all my ideas of what made up cat out the window. I love this line so much that I'm buying several more (I've NEVER done that before. I'm a buy-because-I-love-the-author girl). Next's heroine is older (maybe the 40 something viewpoint appeals now I'm looking at middleage???) but more than that, the story I read was closer to Women's Fiction than to straight romance. The characters were warm and full, deliciously portrayed, with many real-sounding layers I could root for. Yep, I'm hooked. On cat! Who'd have thought it.

So this is an apology to all those cat writers I may have inadvertently offended over the years. I was wrong. I don't hate cat, I just had to find the purrrr-fect line.

Next, please. :-)

I've Got The Power

But I don't think I'm plugged in....

Somewhere in between the daily whirl of cleaning the toilets and picking up my kids' socks which they haven't turned out the right way, AGAIN, after me telling them some seven million times (and no that isn't nagging, it is reinforement -- steel girder reinforcement, but still...), I tend to take on the feel and value of a used dish rag. It's no wonder I turn to writing to save me --my golden ticket to the Wonker chocolate factory, my secret passion for dictatorship with moir on the throne instead of cleaning it, my secret challenge to the whole male universe. Bwhahahahaha.

Before you wonder what Babe has been drinking and what's brought on her sudden delusion of adequacy, let me just say that I've been reading other blogs, most particularly, that of Jennifer Crusie, and she's inspired me to look at my writing in a new way.

You've gotta love Jenny Crusie. She's bold, sexy and outspoken, but what I admire most is the way she empowers women. Particularly, me. :-) Take, for example, her view on romantic comedy (since that is what I mostly write.)

"If romance novels are a guilty pleasure, then romantic comedies are the designer chocolates of literature, rich, fun and seemingly without nutritional value. But underneath that sugar coating is one of the most feminist forms of literature ever devised. Jane Austen knew it two hundred years ago and writers like Susan Elizabeth Phillips know it today: romantic comedy empowers women and makes their world a better place."(Crusie: Romantic Comedy)

Who knew I was a closet feminist, much less a purveyor of designer chocolate!!?? Certainly not my kids.

No, I don't think I'll be burning my bra anytime soon. My Cooper's Droopers might become a falls risk without some means of contraint. I am, however, fully intending to write more subtly subversive literature valuing women, their choices and their rights to an opinion -- aka rom com/ verbal fluff/pop lit. Who knows where my wickedness will lead me? Today my computer, tomorrow the rest of the whirled.

I Think I Love Kristin Nelson

Oh my hat, have you read Evil Editor?
http://www.evileditor.blogspot.com/

I nearly wet my pants reading Kristin's "pick the plot" sections and her comments on the guitarist-secretly-turned-wrestler MS -- deliciously snarky and hilarious to boot (though I think she sank said boot into the last victim's fundamental orifice.) She certainly doesn't wrestle with diplomacy! PC stands only for personal computer to this girl, no politically correct punches or half-Nelsons pulled. But she also offers advice on how to do it better, how to get it right next time. Gotta love that!

I think I have a new addiction. Like I needed something else to claim my time.... But hey, she's an agent. I'll class it as research. :-)

What Came First?

The chicken or the egg-asperating methods of law enforcement that keep us all frightened? According to an email I recieved this week, the following yarn is based on a true story.

George Phillips of Meridian, Mississippi was going up to bed when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window.

He opened the back door to go turn off the light but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things. He phoned the police, who asked, "Is someone in your house?" and he said 'no'. Then they said that all patrols were busy, and that he should simply lock his door and an officer would be along when available.

George said, "Okay," hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the police again. "Hello I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people in my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now cause I've just shot them all." Then he hung up.

Within five minutes three police cars, an armed response unit, and an ambulance showed up at the Phillip's residence. Of course, the police caught the burglars red-handed. One of the policemen said to George: "I thought you said that you'd shot them!"

George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"

Now I don't know how much truth remains in this Urban Legend, but it sounds about right, doesn't it? How often we mosey along without setting the right priorities until everything escalates so that we have to pay it some attention.

One More Push!

My time is full, more than full actually, but I just proved you can always cram something more into a full bag. (See, I should have asked Kristen or some other shopping guru earlier to find out this was entirely possible! Of course another shopping bag/ring/C note will fit on my hand.)

Last Friday I recieved an invitation to enter the Cleo Pozzo Literature competition. My schedule for this week was ... well, spilling over into next week! Yikes. But I really wanted to enter this, and at the urging of my CPs who have much more confidence in my abilities than I do, I decided to give it a try. To get the story posted and there on time, I'd only have 3 days in preparation. One plotting and freaking out, one writing and drinking copious coffee, one editing/printing and freaking out.

So "Ashes to Ashes" was born. On time. One of my CPs rushed it through final edits in just over an hour and loved it. Woo Hoo. Always good to hear.

So now I am sitting here in shock. I did it! I really did. Met a deadline shorter than Goldie Hawn's skirt. BUT, and there's always a but, now I'm out of printer ink and have to save my masterpiece onto a memory stick and print it out at work. I'll still be on time as long as no more catastophies fall on me. I even have an hour or so to spare. Who'd have thought it? (Yes, I will have to get the housework, dinner preparation, and grocery shopping done in under half an hour, but what's that for Super Babe, ye of little faith?)

Next time you're looking into a chock-a-block bag thinking you're done, remember, there is aways room for one more little thing if you squeeze hard enough.

Happy sardining, y'all!

Excuse Me!

I thought for a laugh I'd get involved in 13 Thursday. Yes, I know it is Friday here but that's what I get for living in tomorrow land and having so many friends living in yesterday, AKA USA. (Hmm, starting my own alphabet system there.)

Okay, time for my Thirteen Excuses, um .... Reasons Why I am Not Writing at the Moment. :-)

1. My kids just came home from school so I have to peel the teacher's notes and newsletter from the pear core and sandwich remains in the bottom of their bag

2. The sun is still shining outside and it's such a lovely day that if I waste it whoever is organizing daylight saving may put mine into someone else's bank account

3. I'm supposed to be writing a short story for the Cleo Posse competition and my brain has gone completely blank.

4. My CP sent me a great bag of novels to read and I can hear them calling my name.

5. For some reason the maid I don't have hasn't turned up and someone has to get dinner underway pretty soon or the kids will eat the wallpaper.

6. I have so many projects I SHOULD be doing that it's safer to procrastinate and not start any of them.

7. I still haven't unpacked my house yet. (Hey, it's only been 3 months!)

8. I still don't have my new reading glasses and they're the ones set up for computer use (to reduce glare/strain), so consider my not writing as preventative health

9. I don't see any multi-book carrot hanging in front of my face people, editors-- evil glare---

10. Um, I don't need a tenth excuse since there's a zero on the end of the number and that means I just say nothing.

11. Legs eleven- yep, time to shave them. My stockings are starting to look like christmas trees and that isn't allowed until December

12. By the time I finish this blog entry my fingers will have dropped off.

13. I live in tomorrow land so naturally I have to do it tomorrow.

D'ats all folks.

The Fickle Hand of Fetes

Here we are in Springtime (I know, strange for those of you in Autumn) and it's my favorite time of year. Not only do all the flowers bloom and the animals bear fruit, um, babies (fruit of their loins, right?), but Spring is the peak time in Australia for fetes.

I love fetes. Buying little pots of strange plants that sit like unopened Christmas presents, their contents unknown until they flower next year. Second-hand plastic contraptions picked up from the White Elephant stall that you take home with great plans to put to use, only to find you never have time to set it up and can't figure out how things go together without the instructions. Home made sweets that don't quite make it home but form a sticky pile of licked wrapping in the bottom of your handbag. Then there's the joy of knowing that the money you spent on these dubious treasures goes to a good cause- a school/church/charity, so the dosh does double duty- always a good thing.

This week I have to help my kids prepare for their school fete. One contribution is a food stall where the parents make all kinds of goodies, donate them, then turn up on the day to buy them back if no one else does so our kids aren't disappointed. The other stall my 13 y.o. is running "by myself, Mum!" Um, okay. Does that count the plain white t-shirts I had to buy so he could print up uniforms for the 2 boys working for him? Or the gallons of printer ink for the info sheets he intends to give away free with every purchase? Maybe it doesn't count the mess and ingredients used in my kitchen as he makes his "dinosaur treats?" I believe these expenditures are to be written off in the columns of PR and education expenses. I think I have a budding entrepreneur, or swindler maybe.

Yeah, I love fetes.

I think.

The Cat's in the Cradle

And other places apparently. My 13 year old has been furry funny again mutilating lyrics. I caught him singing this version of the old classic to his brother. Apparently he read a spoof on the net somewhere and came up with his own embellishments. The finished product, I'm sure you will agree, is definitely hmmmmmm worthy.

Did you ever think that when you eat Chinese
It aint fried chicken but a dead Siamese
The food tastes great so you don't complain
Though it's not pig you're eating but feline chow mein
And though it looks like sweet and sour pork
It's Garfield on my fork.
Yes, they're telling me cheese is chalk.

Oh the cat's in the kettle at The Peking Moon
And it gets boiled up every day at noon
They feed their patrons cat, but you'd never know
Cause they wrap it up in pastry dough
Yeah then they fry it up in dough

I went to Peking Moon just the day before
Caught them dialing up for birdies at the old pet store
I said that now I knew it all I'd lost my appetite
Cause all those cats in my belly had decided to fight
But I picked up my fork and I heard something mew
And that was when I knew, yeah, for certain that was when I knew

Oh the cat's in the kettle at The Peking Moon
I'd better stopping eating here really soon
Cause I'm sure I saw a member of the RSPCA
Walking past here just today day, boys
And they'll blow this place away

Oh the cat's in the kettle at The Peking Moon
And it's blood is on the hands of the slanty-eyed goon
When they'll close this joint, well it can't be long
'Cause what they're doin's wrong, boys
Which is why I'm singing this song.

Do the 5

I have been challenged to share 5 interesting things about myself. Tough call. According to my kids my life only has 2 interesting things, both of which are sleeping as I write this, so I thought instead I'd admit to a few ODD things about me. Like:

1. I once sang to 10,000 people
2. I sold one of my artworks through MOCA (Museum of Contemporary Art) to raise money to help protect the Dalai Lama when the Chinese were trying to kill him
3. My mother cooked several meals for the Sultan of Brunei
4. I broke my neck when I was 9
5. I have hunted wild rhino on elephant back

But I guess none of that really warrants a mention. :-)

Now for the 5 folk I challenge, hmm Heather, Amanda, Stacey, Zeek, Sarah

What's in a Name?

A friend sent me the following article on market trends in motorcycling. Gave me a few chuckles and hmmmmmm moments so I thought I'd share it.

Looks like Harley is going to have some serious competition in North America.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
At a press conference late Monday, the CEO of Johnson Marine, makers of Johnson outboard marine engines and other recreational equipment, unveiled a new line of heavyweight cruiser style motorcycles designed to compete head to head with industry leader Harley-Davidson.

Peter Long, Johnson brands marketing manager said, "We have studied the market and determined that Harley, while highly successful, has narrowly missed the mark when targeting motorcycle buyers". Long added, "We, at Johnson, are convinced our product hits the target dead center and promises to draw sales away from Harley-Davidson in a way no other motorcycle has been able to accomplish".

The new line of bikes, marketed under the name 'Big Johnson Motorcycles', will, according to Long, deliver what Harley has only promised. "Our research show that this, "Big Johnson" is what Harley buyers are really after".

At the unveiling of the new line Monday, several current Harley owners agreed. "When I bought my Harley, what I really needed was a Big Johnson", said one Harley owner. "But I see now that riding a Harley is no replacement for having a Big Johnson."

Manager Long also said that his company would follow the lead of Harley-Davidson and cash in on a huge market for non motorcycle related products. "We realize that not every guy can have a Big Johnson", said Long, "But image is very important to people. If they don't have a Big Johnson, they at least want to project the image of having one."

Asked if he anticipated Big Johnsons showing up in the hands of Harley owners, Long said it was unlikely. "I just don't see the need to have a Harley if you have a Big Johnson", he said. "And I can't imagine someone who spends all their resources to acquire a Harley having a Big Johnson. I think it boils down to this - You either have a Harley, or you have a Big Johnson, but you are not likely to have both. "Given the choice", said Long. "I think most guys will opt for the Big Johnson". Another force driving sales for the company will come from women. A survey of the wives and girlfriends of nearly 1,000 potential motorcycle buyers indicates less than 5% would approve of their partner spending $15,000 on a Harley Davidson. But, when asked if they would be willing to pay the same amount of money to get their partner a Big Johnson, nearly 4 out 5 thought that would be money well spent.

One female present at the product unveiling was quoted as saying, "There is no way I will let Lonnie drop 15 grand on another one of those Harleys, but 15 grand to get him a Big Johnson? Well, now that's something we could both enjoy and it's something he really needs."

Carla Roundheel, manager of the dealership network now being established, said her motto is simple. "I service what we sell."

Big Johnson motorcycles will be traded on the stock exchange under the abbreviation P-ENVY


I might add, my internal editor was going bonkers when I put this up, but I resisted the urge to correct what is essentially a quote. It wasn't easy. Maybe I need to go riding and loosen up. :-)

Crying Like a Babe

No, I'm not sad. I'm touched to tears. Today I recieved the most amazing gift from my American CP and friend -- a whole bag of books and promo stuff. Now to those of you who live in America this may not be as big a deal since you likely get stuff like this at every conference, but to me.... um, wow. It was like a decade worth of Christmases all came together.

T-shirts, badges, books, pens, bath crystals ... you name it. I am totally blown away. I'm as giddy as a toddler on a ferris wheel. Wow. Now I don't know what to read first and I'm dancing from book to book in pure, tearful glee. My kids are both eyeing off the lolly pop (yeah, you can bet I'll use that idea when I next need to promo) and I think I'll spend the evening looking up the sites of the donators of this great stuff. Anyone that generous must have a good heart, and good hearts make for good writing.

So I'm a thankful Babe today. Thankful for friends who believe in me and my writing, and the love in that support brings me to tears. May you all feel as valued as I do right now. You deserve it.

Boom boom

Happy Halloween to all my American friends. There are always pumpkins and witches everywhere at this time of year, but at $25 a pumpkin, I think my kids will have to be happy carving soap.

Halloween always amuses me. Isn't it funny that all the decorations are for the losing side of this war? I mean, the whole point of the holiday is for all the evil to flee because God's saints are coming the next day.

Anyway, I couldn't let the occasion pass without a few sick jokes, though I'm not sure whether these gems pass as a trick or a treat. Enjoy....

Do zombies eat popcorn with their fingers?
No, they eat the fingers separately...

What is a vampire's favorite sport?
Casketball...

Did you hear the cannibal was expelled from school?
He buttered up his teacher.


Why do mummies have trouble keeping friends?
They're too wrapped up in themselves...

How do you fix a jack-o-lantern?
With a pumpkin patch.

What does a vampire never order at a restaurant?
A stake sandwich...

Why did the Vampire subscribe to the Wall Street Journal?
He heard it had great circulation...

What do baby ghosts wear on their feet?
Boo-ties

What do you call a ghost in a torn sheet?
A holy terror.

What do you get when you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its radius?
Pumpkin pi.

'til next time, bless you all, and c'on the saints!

American Dreamz

Oh my hat, I haven't laughed so much in an age! In my opinion, "American Dreamz" is a totally fab, satire-iffic attack on all that is wrong with American pop culture. It mocks everything and everyone from the pompous, shallow-hearted rich to the tawdry, tasteless white trash. Fashion, music, television, even the conflict with Iraq - no one and nothing is safe from its accusing and amusing finger.

The movie is based around the shooting of an "American Idol" type TV show. Martin Tweed (played by Hugh Grant) is the heartless compere who's doing the show for his own fame and adulation. He's rude, foul-mouthed, and well...basically a great rip off of Simon Cowell. I found him loathsome and yet facinating- like watching a train wreck.

The contestants- oh my! Sally Kendoo (Mandy Moore) sure is a CAN DO girl. She's a self-serving, fame-hungry southerner-- a female version of Hugh's character but without the cash. Her role mocks the flippant, self-serving attitudes of fizz-pop icons like Britney Spears (the singer we all love to hate) who use their body and anyone around them to further their career.

Inevitably Mandy ends up in bed with Hugh in the most sad and empty way. Aside from a few body fluids, all they share is a great love of themself. But the sexual romp sparks off a series of pathetic and melodramatic events that almost border on slapstick in some places.

The Arab contestant, Omer (Sam Golzari), is really a lovable failed terrorist being forced by fanatics to annihilate President Staton (Dennis Quaid). The president has just been reelected, but is bewildered about this world he is supposedly running. The conflict between these two is a case of the pitiable attacking the clueless, yet I found myself caring about both sides. As the president begins to question his role, Vice President Sutter (Willem Dafoe) who is a mockery of Dick Cheney, signs President Staton up to appear on the season finale of American Dreamz so he can redeem his image to the American public. There is a great play on what the public sees versus what is really happening.

Paul Weitz directed this brave movie. I say brave because, while I totally loved it, any American not able to laugh at themselves might get ticked off at how well he barbeques so many of their sacred cows. But if you love to laugh and are not easily offended, this is definitely worth an afternoon and a big bag of popcorn.

Deidre Knight's new book

Deidre Knight Cranks up the Heat in Her Latest Installment in the Parallel Series: PARALLEL HEAT

"Intelligent characters, hot romance and breathtaking adventure with epic feel—exactly what I want to read!" - Susan Grant, New York Times bestselling author



"A fantastic and riveting new voice in paranormal fiction." -Karen Marie Moning, New York Times bestselling author of Spell of the Highlander



"At times humorous, at others heart-wrenching, but always compelling, Deidre Knight offers readers a fresh, wonderfully creative glimpse at the complexity of human decisions. What a page-turner!" - Gena Showalter, Author of Playing with Fire



In the unforgettable, alternate world of Parallel Heat, two enemies are bound by betrayal, vengeance—and forbidden passion.



Warrior and royal guardian Marco McKinley has been assigned a vital mission on Earth, where a war between human fighters and otherworldly soldiers is rising in the far reaches of Wyoming. But he's also been warned about twists of fate yet to come-ones that will transform him into the enemy of his own people and appoint him the personal protector of beautiful soldier Thea Haven.



Little do Marco and Thea know, but they have met before in an alternate universe, and they are bound by betrayal and vengeance. Now, on a world at the brink of destruction, forbidden passion ignites—but will the destiny Marco has glimpsed unfold a second time?



Sign up for Deidre's newsletter and be eligible to win a $50 Amazon gift certificate, signed copies of her books, and plenty of other goodies! Just click here.



Check out the book that launched the series, PARALLEL ATTRACTION or order your copy of PARALLEL HEAT today! And coming in April, PARALLEL SEDUCTION.

Miss Me?

Hi, gang! I'm just back from my week in rat race Sydney. My pockets are empty, my feet ache and my head is still spinning - phew! Nice to visit, but no place for a hayseed like myself. If I stayed any longer someone would surely have planted me in the botanical garden.

You know I have to inflict at least one holiday snap on you. It's obligatory to torture readers after such a prolonged absence, so here is the view from my hotel's glass-enclosed swimming pool on the 17th floor. You should have seen this view at night- almost a 360 wall of lights reflecting in the dark waters of Darling Harbor. I felt like I was swimming in heaven. Since eateries and shopping establishments from a plethora of cultures and designers lined the harbor banks, who knows, maybe it WAS heaven?

Or so it seemed until my bratz found and consumed all the sugar packets in our suite's comlimentary coffee bar. Then the angels went bad. I think real estate values tumbled, along with everything else. Their bouncing probably shook the hats off peasants in China. Maybe it was the sugar high that convinced them that the hotel's silk pillows would make good cannon fodder in a battle of the beds. But it wasn't entirely their fault. I mean REALLY!!!! WHO puts kids beds on wheels, even in an urban Mecca? Sheesh. Why not just paint a large target on the emaculate white plaster walls. At least my boys didn't throw themselves or anything else from our tenth floor balcony, though I came close to throwing myself off a few times.

Shopping in Sydney is an artform perfected by lipstick-enhanced barracudas in Jimmy Choo stilletos. I swear, those girls must be born with shop mirrors super-glued to their foreheads. Foreign chicks (i.e. anyone not from Sydney)can take a hike, preferably back to Hickville in their gumboot specials, since everyone knows the barracudas OWN the changing rooms and the shop girls. Needless to say, I came away from the eye-catching boutiques without clothes, well other than the ones I wore in, though even that was a close call- lucky my clobber was sooooooo last season!

Now I'm back in Tassie, and it's time to get serious about finishing edits on "One Doctor:Well Heeled" and "Come to Heal". I have to get them done. Christmas is coming and I'll soon have to change into my Santa hat, also very last season. Of course some things are timeless classics, at least outside of Sydney they are. (Believe me, after seeing a fluffy purple christmas tree for sale in Sydney I figure NOTHING is timeless there!)

Anyway, I want my manuscripts done before the gingerbread and eggnog call. I also have a short to write for a very worthwhile charity, but you'll have to wait for another post to hear about that one.

The Value of Solitude

This is Orford Beach where I camped the weekend before last. It's a place of peace and quiet such as we rarely find these days, especially where I live with chainsaw-happy neighbors.

I love Orford. I took a walk on the pure white sand with just seagulls and foam-capped waves for company. Maria Island loomed before me, wrapped in its blue ocean scarf and sky beret. Last century this was a place of great misery and hardship. It still groans with history and convict ruins, but now the trials of those early men wear the decorations of time and forgetfulness. The graveyard is a place of interest, not dread. Isn't it odd that more than a hundred years after men suffered and died, resentful for being cut off from everything they knew and loved, I admire its beauty, treasuring that very isolation.

I wonder, in another century, will people look with new eyes on the things that most menace me and see value? Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could develop that insight now and save ourselves the grief in between.

Why Husbands should NOT be let out shopping on their own

The following is apparently taken from a real letter and indicates what sort of other life your signiticant other may be having unbeknown to you.

Dear Mrs X,

During the past six months security have been monitoring your husband's behavior in our store. The list below details his offences and can be verified by surveillance cameras.

June 15: took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts while they weren't looking
July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Homewares to go off at 5 minutely intervals
July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms
July 19: Walked up to an employee and in an official tone told her "Code 3 in Housewares" and watched what happened
August 2: Took a bag of M&Ms to the service desk and asked to put them on layby
Sept 14: Moved a "Caution:Wet Floor" sign onto a carpeted area
Oct 4: Looked into security camera and used it as a mirror to pick his nose
Nov 10: Asked clerk in the gun department if they knew where he could get antidepressants
Dec 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from Mission Impossible
Dec 10: Practised his "Madonna" look in the auto department using several sizes of funnels
Dec 18: Hid in the clothing rack and when customers looked through jumped out yelling "Pick me, pick me!"
Dec 23: Went into the fitting room, shut the door and after several minutes yelled very loudly, "There is NO toilet paper in here!"

When approached and asked if he required assistance he screams, "Why can't you people leave me alone." If announcements are made over the loud speaker he falls to the floor in a fetal position yelling "No! No The voices in my head are back." When given verbal warnings and asked not to return he responds rudely that as long as his wife shops here, he will too. To that end, you are forthwith banned from our store.

Your sincerely,

XXX

Feel better about YOUR husband yet? :-)

Tread Softly

A tribute to my mate, Kristen's, latest fitness cam-pain. Click on the pic. :-)

Out of the Mouths of Babes

Not this Babe, but a room full of grade two school children.

I just love the BRILLIANT answers they gave to the following questions.

Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?

1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother & not some other mom?

1. We're related.

2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2 She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms & dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home & dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

That's all folks. I hope you enjoyed these pocket-sized sages as much as I did. There is something uplifting in the sweet honesty of these kids, something that strikes a chord within us and swells our heart. If we could bottle that precious nectar I think the product would fly off the bookstore shelves. It is that joyous, life-enriching humor that I would love to capture in my stories. Wish me luck. :-)

Bunyips and Yowies

Hey, y'all, my CPs just informed me that most Americans have never heard of a Bunyip, so I figured maybe you'd like to hear about one of our most famous mythical creatures.

The bunyip (also called a yowie)is commonly featured in Australian children's stories. We even have chocolate yowies for sale in the supermarket with plastic native animals inside them. Are they real? Well, you be the judge.

Bunyips are supposed to live at the bottom of lakes, billabongs (dried up river beds) and dams. They emerge at night to prey on animals, women and children and give a loud bellowing cry if approached. When the Aborigines hear the cry, they stay away from the water, which is why I've always enouraged the stories in my home. It keeps little kids from wandering alone in places where they might drown. By the time they doubt the stories, mostly they can swim.

There were many "sightings" in the 1930's during the Depression when many tramps and vagrants (swagmen)took to the road to find work. They often lived near bodies of water to survive, so who better to see a Bunyip?

Descriptions vary widely- tusks, four legs, flippers, a large oval body and a tail like a horse is the most common, but they have also been described as hairy, scaled, feathered, fur, long tail, long neck, horse head, bird head etc... I guess it depends how drunk the seer was at the time. :-)


Some people believe the bunyip was a Diprotodon, an Ice-Age marsupial that co-existed with the early Aborigines before becoming extinct. Another theory is that Bunyips are seals, that somehow made it far inland, or crocodiles. But whatever it is, you don't want to mess with a bunyip.

According to folklore a fisherman once caught a baby bunyip, and although his companions begged him to put it back in the water, he refused to do so. Naturally the mother bunyip was furious. She retaliated by causing the waters of the lake to rise until the whole countryside was flooded and the baby floated back to her.

This is not a Movie

And I'm too much of a lady to say what it is! I'm talking about "My Date with Drew." UGH! Please, don't waste valuable time/money on this self-indulgent piece of junk. This actually won HBO Comedy Arts Festival Audience Award, Sonoma Valley Film Audience Award, and New York Gen Art Festival Audience Award. All I can say is, what were these guys smoking?

I agree with the comments of Owen Gleiberman from Entertainment Weekly.

"My Date With Drew is stupefyingly tedious and annoying, since even Herzlinger's fixation on Barrymore comes off as a quasi-sham. What he really craves is a date with fame, a mistress destined to stand him up."

And Kurt Loder's review.

"someone actually says of the whole undertaking, 'The dumbing-down of America is complete.' … Let's at least hope it doesn't get too much dumber than this."

Not convinced yet? How about this one by Geoff Pevere, Toronto Star, More Cream of the Crop?

"this movie may offer all the delight of being slowly dragged by a pickup truck along a stretch of remote rural flat-top."

Whether we write books or movies, we MUST deliver what we promise. In this case the label should be "Pathetic Home Mde Documentary."

It's too late for me, but save yourself. This "movie" is cruel and unnatural punishment, AND they make you pay for it. What cheek!

Apologies to Cat Stevens

Wriggle over Wiggles. Move over Electric Mayhem. My seven year old has a mad passion for Cat Stevens. With the zealous adoration of youth he has learned all the lyrics to all Cat's songs, but his favorite is "Father and Son", which sounds hilarious coming from such a small songster.

My other son, who is thirteen going on thirty, likes nothing better than to tease his brother by butchering the lyrics, sometimes with hilarious result. Take this afternoon's effort, sung while his little brother was sitting on the toilet. (To be fair, little brother was singing the original while on the toilet but that's a whole 'nuther issue.)

"Take your time, stink a lot
Stink like centuries of rot
For you may still be here tomorrow
But your friends may not."

Maybe I should get HIM to write my comedies. :-)

The Latte the Better

What is this, cup of Vincent Van Jo? I saw this on another blog and thought I'd pass on the giggle to all my fellow caffeine addicts. Wonder if they do Chai- nese art for tealovers too?

Latte Art - video powered by Metacafe

Not a Carie in the World

I just found out my laptop has a blue tooth! Who knew? Should I consider dental whitening for my electronics now? Gee, I thought saving up for braces for my kids was bad.

Treat Me Right

Hello dears. Glory here. This week I'm putting up the recipe for lamingtons, those little cakes that look like they're suffering with dandruff. Lamingtons are the staple of all good Aussie fetes (school or church fairs.) They're said to be named after Lord Lamington, Governor of Queensland from 1895 - 1901, but personally I think they were named after Ned Kelly. He was the one on the lam after all.

Ingredients:

6 eggs
2/3 cup castor sugar
1/3 cup cornflour
1/2 cup plain flour
1/3 cup self-raising flour
2 cups (180g) coconut, approximately

Icing:

4 cups (500g) icing sugar
1/2 cup cocoa
15g butter, melted
2/3 cup milk
Method:

Grease 23cm square slab pan. Beat eggs in medium bowl with electric mixer about 10minutes, or until thick and creamy. Gradually beat in sugar, dissolving between additions. Fold in triple-sifted flours. Spread mixture in prepared pan. Bake in moderate oven about 30 minutes. Turn onto wire rack to cool.
Cut cake into 16 squares, dip squares into icing, drain off excess icing, toss squares in coconut. Place lamingtons on wire rack to set.
Icing: Sift icing sugar and cocoa into heatproof bowl, stir in butter and milk. Stir over pan of simmering water until icing is of coating consistency.
Makes 16 lamingtons

A Cooking Tip: The cake is easier to handle if it's a little stale. Day old cake is ideal, which means if I want to make lamingtons I have to hide cake from Gabriel and Henry. Sponge or butter cake can be used. Lamingtons can be filled with jam and cream, if desired. Best enjoyed with billy tea, good friends and wonderful conversation. What's your favorite treat?

Blessing Glory B- a christmas story in the making

Biblical Lego

I kid you not. Check it out! http://www.thebricktestament.com/the_life_of_jesus/the_last_supper/mt26_20.html

Questionable

There's nothing so fine, as a great come-back line.
As the following so rightly prove --

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?


Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.


Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. When a couple has a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.

How Much Can We Bare?

One frazzled mum, two bratty kids and three days of school holidays to go.

 

More Soul than Heels

One of my mates is walking her designer heels off to raise money for cancer research. Can you help? She'll make it worth your while. She's running a competition and giving away free books to the generous. Why not check it out?

The Rules:
1. Donations must be a minimum of $10. Donating $20 will enter you twice, $30 three times, etc.
2. If you've donated before, thanks, but it doesn't count for this contest. I know, I know, it's not fair. Would you rather walk the 60 miles yourself?
3. Since there are three books, there will be a 1st, 2nd and 3rd prize. First place gets their choice of the books, second can pick from the two remaining and third gets what's left.
4. If you enter more than once with a donation of more than $10, you can win more than once. So technically, if only one person donates $30, they win all three books.
5. Once you donate, the site keeps track of amounts and dates donated, so you don't have to do anything else.

Here's her donation page:
http://www.kintera.org/atlanta06/kristenpainter

Email her at kristen@romancedivas.com if you have any questions.

Fanny ... er Fan Lit

For some reason not known to myself I have entered the Avon Fanlit competition and written my first chapter of a Regency. Talk about stepping outside my comfort zone. Heck, I think I invented a whole 'nuther universe outside my comfort zone. But it's been an interesting experience.

For a laugh I thought I'd include all the comments on my work, both good and bad. I particularly like the one about my writing being stilted since it sounds like it's been twice translated from another language. Gotta love the irony in that.

So without further ado, the comments... enjoy.

I liked the title! Loved your descriptions. You've created interesting characters.

Excellent turn of phrase--lovely Regency voice. Plot was very intriguing and story flowed beautifully. I'm dying to know what happens next! Loved, "tongues wagged with envy-spiked malice." Well done!

This was beautifully executed and the best entry I've read so far. An enjoyable chapter, and the dialogue between them was brilliant.

This is well done with innuendo and double entendre on many levels. I love that both the hero and heroine (I assume this is the case) are intelligent and at odds. This could be a tour de force-- a la Shakespeare's The Tempest.


Wonderful voice! Entertaining chapter...and "spotted dick". LOL


Great sotry! Loved it!


Nicely done!


More more more, I want more. Good luck.


I found it a bit stilted in the writing.


I'm intrigued. Spotted dick........I laughed at that. Good work. A few easy punctuation errors to fix. Nice work.


You've got a way with words, but there's too much psychological musings by him- and I've always found the idea that a hero can just 'tell' if somebody's a virgin or not to be improbable.


I got confused: Damien; Lord Cromwell: and whether or not he's an Englishman or working for the Prince of Monaco or the Prince of Wales.


Intriguing premise. Just the right amount of information about the main characters' motivations for the first chapter. Well-written but sometimes comparison slow pace too much.


Quite a few errors and pacing was a little too slow.


Great stuff - I liked your characters and the setting was great. I'm fascinated and would definitely read on.


Whippet is a great word


Loved the writing and the dialogue. Very intriguing.


Can't wait to read more.

I don't know about comparing someone to a dog...Some modern phrasing that need reworking! But not a bad story overall!


Very nice writing and some great innuendo. However, I don't buy Damien's suspicion, and some anachronisms threw me out of the story.


LOVE THIS ONE


Interesting start. Witty, and funny. I enjoyed it.


Funny and interesting. I enjoyed it!


Bravo! Best of the five I've read so far.


good!


A slightly different take on the story that i found interesting. good voice. some of the areas of the story kinda confused me. I wish i could explain better sorry


Intriguing...I like the twist with the pendant.

The Wild and Free

Money free that is. It's school holidays here and I'm the one getting lessons in subtraction. Two kids to the movies, a sandwich, drink and cookie each from Subways, 2 haircuts and one school uniform short-sleeved shirt and pair of shorts for each boy, $5 worth of dog muchies to recompense our poor old pooch for the chiblings being home and running her ragged, and voila, empty purse. Not even enough left for the coffee I desperately need to keep up with them. School holidays --grrr. We've made biscuits (cookies for you Americans), painted cards, gathered seaweed for our compost heap (which is a lot more fun than it sounds), and um, what the heck else can we do that costs nothing, doesn't make a mess and takes little or no effort? One more week to go.  I think I can, I think I can...

And "The Wild"? Well, it's not as witty or entertaining as "Over the Hedge" or "Madagascar", but I love the Cockney Koala. I notice on Disney's official site you can see what semi-digested eucalyptus leaves look like. Oh goodie-- mustn't miss that. ;-) 

A Message From Glory B

Hello? Never can work these darn techno things? Hello? Is it on?
Oh good. Just want to say it's good to meet you all at long last and.... hmm?......No they don't want to know about me. It's the food they've come for, and who could blame them. My kitchen is always full. Especially when Henry the sixteen stone moggy squeezes in. No, he's not REALLY sixteen stone, just four, but he does so hurt my feet when he sits on them.
Anyhow, it's my firm belief that it's never too soon to practise cooking your treats for Christmas or birthdays or anniversaries or .... well, you get my my drift. So in honor of it being the first Wednesday of the week .... oh, it's TUESDAY? CLose enough ... I'm sharing with you my delicious recipe for Snicker Doodles. No snickering, dear, not unless you have a ... nub of butter going soft. Anyway, without further ado, let me get to the real reason you're all here....

SNICKER DOODLES

1 cup butter
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 eggs
2 3/4 cups flour
2 tsp. cream of tartar
1 tsp. baking soda
1/4 tsp. salt

Mix butter, sugar and eggs. Add remaining ingredients. Roll into balls the size of walnuts. Roll in a mixture of 2 tbsp. sugar and 2 tsp. cinnamon. Bake on ungreased cookie sheet for 8-10 minutes in 400 degree oven.

Eat them in good health. Don't let my brother Gabriel near them, and see you again soon. God Bless.

"Blessing Glory B" - a christmas story in the making

In Silent Remembrance

911

More People Should Take Up Smoking

Apologies in advance for the long rant but Babe is spitting the dummy.

I recently got slice and diced on another blog for my comment about poor writing in some erotica getting sold because it was covered by bad words and crassness. Now why folks were offended is beyond me. For one thing, as I pointed out at the time, I've read very little erotica so chances are good that I haven't read their work and equally my perception could just be from reading a poor sample of what's available. Even those whose work I might have read a little of would have been in RD contests where we're still honing and perfecting our pieces so it would hardly be a definitive example of their work. Most of my disrespect of erotica comes from pubbed stuff I've won or seen in the library and read enough of to want to puke, then put back/thrown away. Just this week I read about 20p of an "award winning" erotica writer and came across sloppy writing and some stuff that was medically inaccurate. I hate bad writing in all its forms, and yes, I realize that what constitutes "bad writing" may vary and I am not the standards police, but firstly , my opinion is as valid as the next and secondly, some tenets of what makes good writing must surely stand or else what is the point of learning craft at all?

Anyhow, I was shocked to be carved and took my wounds to RD where I did in deed get some support that this woman was just making an ass of herself rather than bringing me down, and some of that support even came from erotica writers I might add so clearly my comment was not offensive to all. But to some it was a red flag. I got a couple of girls who disagreed with me, that's cool, but some others who poured unmitigated venom and defensiveness down the line. Oh boy! Why is it folks who say they "don't blow smoke" think that's an excuse to beat their POV down your neck in an aggressive and disrespectful way? Don't they know that their fire will burn just as bright if they say what they mean politely, and in fact, I for one am much more likely to listen. If I want temper tantrums I'll spend more time with my kids. There is a difference between assertively stating your case and refusing to let anyone else HAVE a case. I find it ironical that those who scream loudest against censorship, even a perceived slight on their right to be offensive, are the very ones who jump on anyone expressing a conservative opinion. Hah! As the saying goes, "Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain."

So I decided to bow out, not answer and leave them to rant. They weren't really listening as evidenced by what they thought I was saying as opposed to what I really said. There was agenda being pushed whether it fit or not. Unfortunately another girl who could see the agenda and hypocrisy in action tried to point this out and became collateral damage. I feel terrible about that. Furthermore, to keep the peace since I am a moderator on the board, I needed to ask everyone to calm down which could be construed as this girl being in the wrong when she wasn't IMO. The thing is, there are enough real problems in the world without beating up new ego-driven ones. And for a parting shot I might add that I have read erotica writers who IMO were good writers and yes, initially when I found them it challenged what I believed about the genre. Hey, I never claimed to be perfect.

The Fun Vs Safe Tightrope

As a mum, sometimes it is hard to know where to draw the line to keep kids safe. As I write this, my two terrors are using our long, sloped driveway to see how much speed they can get up on their scooters. They're on asphalt and I gotta tell ya, they're really moving. If they fall off they're gonna split lips and take off enough skin to resurface an Egyptian mummy. But they're also having a delightful time, yelling and whooping and letting off steam levels that only mothers of little boys will really understand. It's a sight to behold.

So I'm sitting here in a quandary. Part of me is nervously chewing its nails waiting for the next trip up to the ER, while the other part is going rah-rah like a cheer squad as skills get pushed to their very edge and the boys zoom past my window faster than a flock of fishing ganets. What's a girl to do?

I figure writing is a bit the same. First we wobble, then we're tentative, then we say, "to hell with it" and push ourselves to the max letting our hearts and emotions drive us where angels fear to tread. To fully develop our abilities we must take our skills a hair's breadth from coming unstuck. If we misjudge it we'll be a mess, yet it's when we're fanging as fast and far and wild as we know how that we learn to whoop and holler and fly.

Plover Love

Sometimes the smallest things have more power over us than they think. As spring gets chugging here, not only are we inundated with bulbs that seem to appear out of nothing and explode in a floral rainbow, but zillions of baby animals are born. That's my favorite part of the year. Living in a country area, this population explosion becomes even more noticeable- fields of lambs, foals and calves on every side- gorgeous. But the cutest award would have to go to the plovers.

Don't get me wrong, normally I hate plovers. When they're nesting they commandeer a field and dive bomb anyone who goes near like rabid magpies with PMS. They get so vicious my kids will walk the long way around rather than incur avian wrath by cutting through the field (I guess that's the plover's aim). But nesting is all done for the year now. The babies have hatched and, well, have you ever SEEN a baby plover?

Here I am driving along our road drumming my fingers on the steering wheel and whistling an outdated tune the radio station seems to favor when yikes! Stand on the brakes. The plover family is crossing the road --mum and a flock of itty bitty things the size of large pebbles. They hear the car. They drop, right there on the road. Now they look like a sprawled pile of pebbles, living scree. Seriously, if I hadn't seen them drop I might have driven over them unknowingly. But there they are, still and silent and covering the road where I want to go. I wait. I turn off the car. Nothing. In the end I have to get out and shoo them off the road before I can drive away.

Sometimes it is the smallest things in life that stop us. Why? Because we care about them, and maybe that's not such a bad thing.

Cry-key

I can't believe Steve Irwin is dead. Yes, he courted death almost every day of his 44 years, but somehow he seemed untouchable, larger than life, and madder than a cut snake, which may explain his passion for reptiles. My kids love his wildlife park. They've nursed his boa. It took both of them and a helper to hold her. It's hard to not to admire what Steve's done for ecology. I wish we had more folk like him. Goodbye to one of Australia's precious and unique sons. He will be sadly missed.

What a great steaming pile of poop!

Chicken poop that is. Yep, manure is the popular scent this Spring, at least to the horticulturally minded. I'm top dressing my garden and spreading in actuality what life has been spreading metaphorically for the past few months. Fertilizing always makes me wonder how stuff that smells so bad that your eyeballs fry and your nose hairs fall out can turn into roses and apples? Magic, huh. Now I'm hoping the rest of the poop in my life turns up roses too. A multibook deal perhaps. Heck, who am I kidding? At this point the margin in a schoolboy's notepad would do.

Spring is sprung,
the poops been flung,
and here I'm standing in the dung
The birdies tweet
And flowers smell sweet
But I can't say the same for my dung-clung feet.

I Love a Man with Brains

Some Like it Hot

BRANDED by Emma PetersenComing from Cobblestone Press September 22, 2006 Jenny and Ty have known each other most of their lives and have been attracted to each other since they've been old enough to know what attraction meant. A tragedy has bought Jenny back home to Parsons' Pass and into Ty's arms. The heat between them is as hot as ever, but the scars he carries from his parents' relationship and his own failed marriage keep Jenny at bay. When Ty comes close to losing the most important person in his life, he knows it's time to bury the past and fight for their love.Click here for excerpt.

In the Pressure Cooker

I think I've been wearing a "kick me" sign lately. Seriously, just because my buns look like a couple of spandex-wrapped soccer balls doesn't mean I'm waiting for your boot. Oi. I went to a Marine College open day and had the girl organizing the simulator tried to skip me in the queue when there wasn't room for everyone- after my kids and I were the second lot to join the queue and thousands came later. We just looked like a soft touch. Then I had the organizers of an on-line group I belong to mistakenly slip me in with the pile of slackers they were sacking as moderators. Me, who always does the job. Hah! Turns out it was just a slip by the overworked organizers but gee, why me? I'm feeling really picked on. Then the neighbors dumped a huge snake-attracting, fire-risk pile of timber next to my fence which is a stone's throw from my door. AND they bought a mini bike which they ride all weekend up and down the piece of driveway that flanks my house. I tell ya, I'm a mild-mannered, peace loving person but I am fast reaching blow point. Ten, nine, eight....

Tagged

1. One book that changed my life:
most of the books by Max Lucado

2. One book that I have read more than once:
The Lord of the Rings- I've read the set so many times and each time the story and writing suck me in. I even read the whole thing out loud from cover to cover to my son. It was our sharing time of an evening and he never wanted me to stop. He also reads it over and over for himself, and though we went to see the movies and even have the films on DVD, both of us prefer to read the book. The language is just so poetic and visual.

3. One book I would want on a deserted island:
the biggest one I could find so I'd have shelter, fire starters and entertainment all in one

4. One book that made me laugh:
any of Evanovich's Stephanie Plum books. That girl blows up more cars and has more junk in her hair than anyone I know. Always makes me giggle.

5. One book that made me cry:
a lot of category books make me cry (laughing) mostly because of the cliches and poor writing

6. One book I wish I'd written:
pretty well any of Jennifer Cruise's later books- hey, what can I say, I'm a sucker for a smart mouth. I like wit.

7. One book I wish had never been written:
I'm glad I wrote all my books, even the first one which needs bulko work before it comes out of the dust bunnies. They each taught me a lot and said something I wanted to say.

8. What I am currently reading:
my composting manual. I just got an aeropost and I'm learning to use it, having mastered the skill of putting it together. Not exactly stimulating reading, but there you have it. Saving the planet, one garden at a time.

9. One book I have been meaning to read:
I'd like to read Nina Bangs' latest release, "Wicked Pleasure"
10. Who's next?:
Heather

Mad Cows

Moo-ve over? Is it true that the Crabby Cows have hoofed off for greener pastures? I herd that they had their hairy rumps tanned because someone had a beef with their raw hide crit style. Puh-lease! It's not like they went out snatching scenes from under the writer's pillow. If you don't want to have your weakesses milked, don't shove your M.S. in their dairy-air. It's a sad day when folks ask for the truth, you give it to them, and you're in trouble because it was a different truth that they were seeking. That's really asking for a faceful of pat answers of the cow pat variety.

But the cows are gone, huh? Sad. I guess it was inevitable someone would roast them or a least drive a steak through their heart . Anyone outstanding in their field, as is the usual bovine want, is targetted for the abattoir from the moment they chew their cud in public. Death to rumination, er... ruminants. What I want to know is, if it's a zoo out there as everyone so often claims, why aren't animals protected? Bring back the bull, er.... cows.

The Spoken Doughnut

Today I'm going to plead Agnes Allen's Law - "Almost anything is easier to get into than out of." How true!

On one of my loops I opened a can of worms with a comment I made about a moral issue close to my heart- a woman's right to choose what happens to her body versus the right of the aborted child. Now anyone who knows me will attest my mouth goes off without thinking about the wisdom of remaining silent sometimes. Just because I have an opinion doesn't mean I should share it. Of course if I was pro-abortion it would be safe and even lauded to share my opinion. Sigh.

Not that I am against women owning their bodies- heck no. But the time to make their choices is when they want to have sex. No contraception is foolproof. Are the risks acceptable? No? Then don't have sex right now. We're not amoebas- we do have a choice. Expecting some innocent baby to pay with its life for you to be able to do whatever you feel like is morally wrong to me, and besides, I think it hurts the women who choose it, too. I don't say these things lightly and there is always the exception/extenuating circumstances etc. I won't judge you if you choose to abort your baby. No one died and made me God. But I would like to say as someone who has studied embryology that these are people not cells. (Unless you are talking morning-after pill- that to me is a judgement call)

As someone who has cared for premature babies I beg you for compassion. Most of us would not accept having a puppy torn to pieces and the bits sucked up so why is it okay for a baby? I once helped save a 32 week abortion. Yes, that is ridiculous and too late to even consider termintation but it happens. Where do you draw the line? We can save babies as young as 23 weeks gestation and that age keeps getting pushed back with technology. These little people are precious. It makes my heart sick to hear others who have never studied these wonders much less seen or cared for them talk about abortion so flippantly. "If I fall pregnant before I'm ready I'll just abort it." Oi. I'd like to take them with me to a birth, then show them on an ultrasound just what they have inside them before they make such choices and statements. At least they should know the seriousness of the choices they make.

But you know, whatever I say it will just label me as a bigot or religious nut or something else derogatory because this view is not the one they want to hear, it is not popular and probably also not PC. Perhaps I should learn to be a word doughnut instead, just spinning round and round, never making a point and with nothing in my heart. At least then I would not offend anyone by disagreeing with their POV.

Writing Larger Than Life

Today I'm feeling whimsical. Must be all the carpet-shampoo fumes going to my head. But you see, flanking my new front door are two Japanese holly, otherwise known as sky pencils for their tall, thin growing habit.

Their poetic name got me thinking. What must it be like to create your own dark velvet parchment and write across it in stars? Awesome? And what language do those stars speak that universally people from every nation and time look up and are inspired by the beauty written there? What does their writer think about the bad reviews and commentary that give credit for his work to un-manned chance and time? Talk about plagiarism at its worst!

I know I can write words on the sky with a sky writing plane (well, after I rob a few banks to pay for it), but only with as fine a control as a child trying to write with an old fashioned computer mouse. Then my message would linger in the sky for minutes not an eternity. Somehow I don't think people in the future will be looking at the plane english and gasping with awe as they read "Eat at Joe's." Nope. I'm not going to inspire a million poems and proposals. A ticket for air pollution maybe.

I'm looking forward to writing again when all the work and hassle of moving house settle down some, but it will be with computer keys, not sky pencils. Pity. Every time I come through my front door I’ll be reminded of my limitations. If I can capture and preserve a whiff of the greater work happening around me in the stories that I write then I'll be exceedingly fortunate and happy.

Scrounging

In the last two weeks since I bought my new house I have been scrounging everything from used newspapers to polish my windows with to plants and plant cuttings to get my garden underway. It is humbling to need the help and kindness of others, but need it I do. If I get to the point of sitting on street corners rattling my cup for coins I'll let you know. Why is there never enough- time, money, energy, heck everything? Gee, we are told that Christ came to give us abundant life yet sometimes I feel that I must have misplaced my abundance somewhere.

Then again, abundance could be a relative thing. I look around me. I have more rooms in my house than people living in it, more food in my pantry than we can eat today, more clothes in my wardrobe than I'm likely to wear out this millennia (of course most have shrunk to a size too small since I had kidlets so they are in no danger of ever being worn out.)

Recently, in the middle of moving chaos, my kids and I put together Christmas boxes. Nothing surprising in that, we do it every year. Last year's went to Thailand I think. Anyway, the organizers have a list of things to put in the boxes- everything from soap and toothbrushes, to clothes, hard candies, school supplies, something to love and something to play with. Apparently the box recipients are delighted by a rubber ball or skipping rope, and get excited by toiletries/school stuff and clothes! Can you imagine our kids if that was all they got for Christmas? Sort of puts things into perspective, doesn't it?

So I got to thinking, maybe what I am most short on is gratitude. How much we in Australia and America have and take for granted. (We don't have tanks rumbling down our streets for starters.) Maybe what I should be scrounging for is enough grace to live the way God intended for me, and enough wisdom to make the best of all he gives me. What are you most grateful for?